PHP Recruiting Email
An email from a recruiter
Dustin,
Always
Are you ready to take the next steps in your career? < YES
But No one wants to do php
I’ve got a client looking for a PHP Developer (Laravel, Javascript) in Nashville, TN. The full job description is below. < So steps backwards?
Indeed
If you are a PHP Developer with experience, please read on! What You Will Be Doing < I am and this makes me sad.
So programing within the paradaigm of the language
Programming with OOP principles and working with PHP! You will be working with an amazing team! What You Need for this Position < Ugh
PHP using OOP principles < So php then
Why?
Experience working in an AGILE work environment < A managment style needs to be in my experience?
No
Experience creating pixel perfect representations based off PSDs < No, developer, not designer
Well, yeah
Expert knowledge in Javascript, HTML5, and CSS3 < Yeah, but not because of my php path
UI, I’m backend so no
Expert knowledge of RWD (responsive web design) < No thank you
Pork Sandwhich Meat
Self-starter with proven track record < Bullshit bullet point, cool
Pork Sandwhich Meat
Excellent communication skills (we use TeamWeek for scheduling and Slack) < Bullshit Bullet Point, cool
Really, with PHP I was expecting CVS
Version Control (Git) experience is a must. < Of course
Well some
Experience with CSS preprocessors like LESS or SASS
Unlikely
Laravel 5+ experience < It’s a 6 year old framework…unlikely
API Integrations
Nice to Have:
Experience with modern front end frameworks Vue.js, or Angular.js v2. JavaScript and HTML load time optimization < THERE IS HOPE, maybe you can switch them to a node backend
What’s In It for You
Nothing
Woo /sarcasm
Highly Competitive Comp Packages…Full Benefits….Amazing Team!! So, if you are a PHP Developer with experience, please apply today! < Yeah, sure, competitive php salary, that’s a thing
If you’re interested, please send me a reply with your updated resume or apply here.
Let me know if you have any questions about the position!
Thanks
